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Some Advice for Donald Trump, Tech Mogul

The launch of Trump's Twitter clone is allegedly imminent, so we thought he could use some pointers as he transitions from politics to tech.

Donald Trump has racked up a lot of achievements: a noxious and omnipresent brand name, a presidency that saw an out-of-control pandemic kill hundreds of thousands of people, a record-setting two impeachment attempts, and father of two possum-human hybrids. Now he’s seeking the ultimate feather in his cap, which is to become one of the nation’s leading tech founders.

His new Trump Technology and Management Group has a lot of plans, they include killing off Facebook and Twitter with right-wing “free speech” social media network Truth Social, rubbing Netflix’s nose in a slate of “anti-woke” programming, and building a tech stack to rival the likes of Amazon and Google. If the ex-president wants to get there, he’ll need to take some advice from his predecessors like Amazon’s Jeff Bezos, Facebook’s Mark Zuckerberg, Theranos’s Elizabeth Holmes, or that guy who sold a machine that squeezed juice bags.

Here are some life lessons from the greats, because no matter how good you are, there’s always something new to learn about sleazing your way to the top.

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