Pornhub has really outdone itself this time. After inventing a wearable that lets you charge your gadgets by jerking off, the popular purveyor of freemium pornography is now offering an uncanny robot butt that twerks. It even comes with a virtual reality headset that offers “the first 3D cybersex experience.” Welcome to the future, pervs.
The descriptively named Twerking Butt does more than just jiggle. The Classic Version of this upside-down artificial ass features something called Cyberskin that heats up and vibrates as well as massages, in six different ways based on input from an included remote control or a corresponding mobile app. Then you’ve got the Deluxe Version which PornHub claims is capable of “endless twerking settings.”
Both the Classic and Deluxe TwerkingButt include a VR headset for the aforementioned immersive cybersex experience. For the next week, Pornhub is offering the Classic and Deluxe versions for $500 and $800, respectively. (They’ll be $700 and $1,000 thereafter.) Both TwerkingButts also include a water jet for cleaning up after the fun.
It all sounds absurd because it is. While the internet was bound to become the ultimate porn consumption tool, VR technology has brought us one step closer to fucking robots and imagining the warm embrace of a human orifice. Now all that’s lacking is an artificially intelligent Android that will respond to our deepest desires and entertain our wildest fantasies. If scifi has taught us anything, it’s how that future will be a really wild ride.
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